My Seriously Amazing Nephew

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Best Pre-Marathon Gift Ever

jaq made me promise that if I posted this video, I would say something to excuse away her bad singing. She seems to think that bad parental singing is really sweet. I think that if you have ever been subjected to my Happy Birthday con gusto song, you will know that there isn’t a thing [...]

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Proud Aunt

Those of you who know me personally know that I’m not that crazy about kids. It’s not so much that I dislike them as I just don’t know what to do with them. They are foreign, alien things. They make me uncomfortable. And people expect (because I’m a woman?) that I’ll have some maternal instinct, [...]

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Avoiding the G-Word*

Christmas Eve conversation instigated by my mother:
Do you still think you don’t want kids?
Yeah.
Why?
Well, I don’t really like them.
You seem to like Emmit.
I do. But he’s different.
It’s different when they’re your own, too!
What’s wrong with your grandkitties?
They are cats, Laura. Not grandkitties. Cats.
But they’re like toddlers! They get into everything, they put everything in their [...]

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Oops, I Did It Again

This was my <gulp> eleventh year as a Catholic school girl. I’d like to point out the frequently underappreciated subtleties of this costume. The necklace that Emmit is grabbing is a St. Jude medal (the patron saint of lost causes; I used to always wear a cross, but they are all–yes, all, there are quite [...]

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Here’s Lookin’ At You, Kid

Start your week off right with pictures of my favorite nephew:

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Love, Aunt Bitch

Dear Banana,
One thing you’re going to have to learn about your Aunt Laura is that she’s late with everything (except singing happy birthday; thank God for phones). Late to appointments, late to work, late with birthday cards. I’d love for you to be the exception to that rule, but I’m afraid I’m already going on [...]

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Excited About His Aunt Laura’s Birthday

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Godzilla Takes Highland Avenue

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The Other Problem With Commuting

When you’re running late… you’re an hour away, no matter how you slice it.
* * *
Other tidbits:
- to Dan, whose comment I only just saw thanks to an overzealous spam filter: do not be filled with jealousy over my 334 page style manual, as it includes many corollaries such as “generally follow the Chicago Manual [...]

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